Friday, June 30, 2006


That has never been a more appropriate title for a post in the history of forever here at Glamorous Redneck. Like my TT down below says, this week has sucked! But! It's a long weekend ahead! Four whole days of no-work bliss! With parades! And pyrotechnics! And perhaps alcohol! See? It just doesn't get any better than that.

CB got the garage all cleaned out for me last night, so tonight all I have to do it fold up the eight frillion piles of clothes and make some semblance of order out of them. But I am strange and I like folding clothes, so this is my little way to work in retail.

My mood is much better today than it was yesterday, and I owe the majority of that to the fact that my friend gave me a HUGE piece of chocolate cake with chocolate frosting last night. Chocolate fixes [almost] everything, don'tchyaknow?

Hmm. . .so I don't really know what else to write about today. I'm sure I'll have lots of fun stories of the freaky people that come out of the woodwork in this town when a garage sale sign is posted in your backyard. Unless I pass out before I get a chance to post. In which case, I'll maybe have an update for you next week sometime.

Until then, Happy 4th of July!!!!

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Thirteen Reasons This Week Has Sucked

  1. I had to go into work on Tuesday
  2. I also had to work today
  3. I am having a garage sale on Saturday
  4. I don’t have anything set out for the garage sale on Saturday
  5. It’s our Fiscal year end at work
  6. Because I had to work, I had no idea it was Thursday today until I went blog hopping
  7. I have a whole lot of crap to do at work
  8. My house is a disaster
  9. I am getting a cold
  10. I haven’t eaten a decent meal in three days
  11. Summer is already almost half over
  12. It’s HOT outside
  13. TRPTWNE is still making us be without an air conditioner downstairs.

I’m still waiting on someone to trade lives with me for the rest of the week. . .

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Someone Shoot Me. Now. Please and Thank You.

The last couple of days have been OUT OF CONTROL!

Yesterday was supposed to be a nice calm day. I was supposed to be able to take CJ to baseball, come home, organize some more garage sale stuff, take Diva to T-Ball, then be home for the day to relax.

I left the house at 8:30 yesterday morning and did not get back home until 3:00. I got called into work because these insane storms keep coming through and causing the power to go out. And every once and a while when the power goes out here, it kills our server. Which is what it did yesterday. Since I'm the only one that knows how to do anything and it wouldn't work over the phone, I had to come in. And we still had to have Techies from our ISP come in and fix the internet. The kids and I breezed out of here with just enough time to get to T-ball. Then Glamour Mom took us out for ice cream. The kids decided that I am the coolest mom in the world because they got ice cream and popcorn for lunch yesterday. Some days you've just got to pick your battles!

Then, I came to work today, knowing that it was going to be a little more crazy than it has been in a while. And I was right. Plus now I have to come in tomorrow so co-worker can get things done. Tomorrow was supposed to be my get-the-garage-ready day. Now I'm going to have to stay up until Midnight Friday night getting things ready. And then I have to be up by six to get signs and everything else out.

So, like I said, someone please shoot me. Now. Or at least come and be me for the next couple of days. Please?

Monday, June 26, 2006

Monday, Monday Ba Da, Ba Da Da

Who's the singer of that song ^ there? Anyone?

I know I've said before that I hate Mondays. Mostly because I can never get my butt out of bed on time. Which makes me rush around trying to get everything done before we go. And the kids are always in S-L-O-W M-O-T-I-O-N. It doesn't make a very good combination. Add to it the fact that I had to leave early because my car was basically running on fumes, and arriving at work was actually a nice break.

But all in all I'm happy this Monday. Why? Because one of my FAVORITE bloggers Winged Emotion bid to rent the glamorous little room in the corner. It's got a great view of the ocean, as opposed to the Redneck side that's got a great view of some trailer courts. . .

Anyway, I LOVE her blog! She's one that I vote for EVERY TIME at Blog Explosion's Battle of the Blogs. So go on, make her feel welcome. And tell her I sent ya.

Also, I made it through the WHOLE hideous book of poems last night. A few themes were common throughout most of them. A brief synopsis follows:

1. There was apparently a lot of rain that caused even more pain
2. There was a lot of pushing people out the door
3. Sometimes I tried too hard to rhyme, so
4. A lot of poems didn't make sense.

Even though there were a few that were beyond stupid (like the one about dolls always watching you) (or the one about a piece of blank paper having nothing to say), there were a couple that were really pretty all right. So should I post em? You tell me. Maybe we should have a poetry corner once a week, yes? I'll post one and y'all can do it too. What do you think?

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Blast to the Past

I am having a garage sale next Saturday. No, there is no death wish. I just have a shopping habit that needs funding.

Anyway, whilst sorting through the rubbermaid tubs in the basement, I came across my journal of poems. I wrote the first one at thirteen. The last one was written at eighteen. There's also a dramatic statement in the very last pages, in which I lamented that "poerty is not only a gift, it is an artform. People who write poetry should not only be recognized, but commended." I remember writing it. I sat down one day with the intention of writing something meaningful, so that if anyone ever found it (like if I were to--you know--like DIE or something), they would recognize me for the undiscovered genius that I was. Then I would become like Emily Dickinson posthumously.

Can we say Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen had to have been written by someone who knew me back in the day? I'm reading through it tonight. Every single painful, purple prose ridden, cheesily rhymed poem in the book.

Also, the parade got rained out. Not just rain, but POURING rain. The kind of rain that comes down sideways and hurts when you walk outside. We were bummed, but the kids still cleaned up on candy. Afterwarads I went to the pageant where the girl I thought would be queen won. Then we came home, and the kids napped until it was time to go watch the fireworks. This is only the third year that our little Podunk has had fireworks, but they do a FANTASTIC job! For a bunch of volunteer firemen who do more gambling and beer drinking than they do actuall fire fighting, they handle the pyrotechnic stuff like old pros.

Today has been spent cleaning. I cleaned Diva's room (a feat on its own), sorted garge sale things, and found a whole stash of books that I haven't read yet. It was like a treasure hunt.

I leave you today with a little tidbit of cheesy poetry. I can't suffer alone here, people.

Love written February 27, 1994 (I was fourteen)
Love is a whisper that speaks in the night
Love is the thing that always turns out right

Love helps you through all happy times and sad
Love helps you through all good times and bad

Love is there when you think life's gonna end
Love is probably your best friend.

*snap-clapping* deep, no? The grooviness, it overwhelms.

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Bliss, Thy Name is Starbucks

I LOVE the little coffee shop here in town. A friend of mine owns it. And I can walk in there on any given day and say, "Surprise me," and she will come up with the perfect iced coffee concotion to fit my mood. It's in a beautiful location, too. When you sit in the dining area, you can look out a big sliding glass window and watch all kinds of birds, squirrels, and even the occasional turtle. It's peaceful. It's heaven. But I can't get a caramel Frappacino there.

I remember the first time I tried one, I was out in San Diego and my Aunt ordered one. I knew as soon as I saw all the whipped cream and caramel goodness that I was going to be hooked. I tried other things to curb my love for the frothy coffee drink, but nothing was right. Even a peppermint patty (which are my favorite candy) flavored coffee from my friend couldn't satiate my need. And I used to have to go all the way to Minneapolis to get my fix.

Then, last month a Starbucks opened up just a half an our away in semi-civilization. I almost wept with joy! But I haven't been there when it is open. Until today.

Today I was in semi-civ all by myself! No kids begging to look at toys! No husband begging me to get out of the book section! I had to get my eyes checked, and since today is the parade, I got the earliest appointment I could. And I knew. I knew my wait would be over. It has been almost three years since my last (real) caramel frappacino. I don't count those ones you can get at the gas station.

When I was done with my eye doctor appointment, I got in my car and sped over to the drive through Starbucks. I victoriously ordered a caramel frappacino. To hell with the diet!

And as the kind worker handed me that fantastic piece of goodness, the heavens opened up and choirs of angels sang "Hallelujah! The craving has been fulfilled! Amen!"

I took my first sip and I almost wept. It was blissfully perfect. And I am in love. I picture myself running through a grassy meadow, that sappy love song playing in the background, twirling around and taking another sip of my delicious caramel frappacino. It was fantastic.

Well, OK, so I'm not THAT odd. But it was nice to finally have a craving go away.

Off to the parade!

Friday, June 23, 2006

Shoulda been a cowgirl

Which is odd, I know. Afterall, I *am* glamorous. But even when I was little, I dreamed of someday owning a ranch--in SoCal, of course--with lots of horses and sheep. And I've since added Alpacas to the mix. I could see myself fitting right in with the cowboys of yore, spending my days taking care of the animals and riding my favorite horse until the sun set every day. I wanted to be that cowgirl with the sparkly sequined shirts, riding through parades and proudly carrying a flag of some sort.

Then I grew up and realized how expensive all these animals are and how much work (and less glamorous) it really would be. But sometimes, I still think I want to be a cowgirl.

Like last night. Our town festival has a western theme to it. When I first moved here, I thought it was odd. After all, aren't most cowboys from Texas and Oklahoma? Why would a small Minnesota town have a cowboy theme? Then I learned more about it, and now it makes all the sense in the world.

The kiddie parade Wednesday night was the first event. Then last night was the first of three rodeo competitions of the weekend. Tomorrow brings a parade, a pageant, and the final rodeo showdown. It's a great weekend. It really is. Especially because I love me some cowboy butts. And I had the cutest one parked next to me all night last night. CB is big into the rodeo. Every year he wishes that he could be a bull rider. The movie 8 Seconds is like his favorite movie. Ever. Anything with cowboy in the title is "his" movie. I swear the boy should have been born during the days of the Wild Wild West.

Yes, I know we are perfect for eachother.

Anyway, this is a really fun weekend. I didn't always enjoy it. But that was when I had lost touch with myself and thought I had an image to uphold. Since I don't give even the slightest bit of thought to what other people think of me anymore, I'm really enjoying myself this year.

Plus there's always the hope I'll see some nekkid cowboys like my mom did a couple of years ago. Some of them boys is CUUU--UUTE! :)

~GR who is feeling much more Redneck than Glamorous today.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Thursday 13

Thirteen reasons I enjoy being a girl

  1. Shoes! What kind of world would this be without all the fun shoes? High heels, low heels, kitten heels, sandals. . .I could go on and on.
  2. Dresses! There is nothing that makes me feel more beautiful than putting on a dress and going out on the town.
  3. Makeup! Ah, sweet makeup. The bane of my checking accounts existence. I’m a sucker for any and every kind there is—especially if there is a . . .
  4. Gift with Purchase!!! Nothing makes me spend money faster than GWP’s. What? I spend $40 and I get $100 in free stuff?!? SIGN ME UP!
  5. Glitter! Glitter makes the world go round, people. Who doesn’t feel happy when they see a card—either homemade or purchased—with all those pretty little sparkles on it?
  6. Confetti! It comes in bubble bath form! They have shapes and colors for every occasion! I truly believe the whole world would be a much happier place if confetti just fell in front of us from the sky.
  7. Roses! Guys just don’t understand and/or appreciate the beauty that is one of these flowers. Nor do they understand the mood enhancement that comes along with them.
  8. Chick Flicks! Another thing that guys just don’t understand. I love the emotion that is associated with these. And I love that there can still be a belief in happily ever after
  9. Pajamas! Whether you like flannel or satin, there is nothing more comfortable—and occasionally sexier—than women’s pajamas. You boys take your flannel pants (or boxers) (or nothing), but I’ll take a satin chemise and robe (and marabou slippers) any day of the week.
  10. Being a mom. I know being a dad is cool and all, but I would much rather be a mom. We work HARD for our babies. Even if you adopt, there is much more emotion involved in being a mom. We’re attached to the little things as soon as they are a twinkle in our eye—even before that, maybe.
  11. Pink! Yeah guys are wearing pink shirts lately, but pink is a GIRL color. Pink can make my mood lift in seconds. Diva’s room is pink and I smile every time I walk in.
  12. Musicals! It’s OK for me to LOVE musicals. I won’t get harassed by my friends or called names because I love to sing along with Hello Dolly!
  13. Bubble Bath! I can find a scent of bubble bath to match any and every mood I’m in. And I can come out of the bath with a whole new outlook on life. Add in a terry cloth robe and come comfy slippers, and you have my version of heaven.

Why do you enjoy being a girl? Or, why do you enjoy being a guy?

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

The Aftermath

The party was not nearly as bad as I had anticipated it to be.

It went off without a hitch, and other than me jabbing one of the girls in the eye accidentally, there were no tears! Everyone loved the cakes and mini PB & J sandwiches. We read a story and since CJ was feeling neglected, we decided to play a game of "decorate CJ with all the streamers". He didn't feel so neglected anymore.

Diva got lots of really cool stuff and my mom and dad were both there and there was no awkwardness whatsoever.

Which pisses me off.

I hate how easily we've fallen into this separated feeling. I hate how "my parents are divorced" can roll off my tongue as easily as my name. I hate that there's no feeling of awkwardness. How we can all just sit there like this is the most normal thing in the world.

But most of all, I hate how this has effected my relationship with my mom. We used to be very close, but now she's just. . .different. Maybe it's because she now lives in a town that is 30 miles away, so I can't just go drop in whenever I feel like it. We used to talk practically every single day. Now it's a good week if we talk twice. One of those times is usually an email.

I hate that my dad is still hurting and my mom is too stubborn to admit that she's hurting too.

I hate that I have a knot in my stomach every time my kids speak to my mom and dad for fear they are going to say something that will inadvertently hurt the grown ups.

And I hate that I feel like *I* am the most grown up of them all.

But that is all how I feel today, right now. Tonight, we'll all be together again and it will feel completely normal--again. And I can hope and pray that maybe someday Glamour Mom won't be so damn stubborn and Glamour Dad will be happy again. That it won't hurt so bad.

Tonight is the Kiddie Parade. I sent Diva to daycare with curlers in her hair so that she can transform into Christine Daae. CJ has all his clothes in place for becoming The Phantom. All that's left to do is cut a hole in the boat so we can put it on the wagon, and buy some batteries for the GHETTO BLASTER (yes I still totally have a ghetto blaster) (no it's not the old school 5 foot long kind, but I still call it a ghetto blaster) to torture the likes of Podunk with some *gasp* CULTURE! How dare we show them all the beauty that is Phantom of the Opera? Cuz I'm already an outcast. And I do have a reputation to uphold. :)

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Caution: Contents Under Pressure

Here's my day so far:

6:45 AM--Delightful time to get a wakeup call from Country Boy. Conversation went as follows:

CB: It's raining outside
GR: Mumble feralkf djfwe
CB: There's thunder and lightening too, so have the kids turn cartoons off for a while
GR: Huh? Err. . .I mean yeah. OK. Turn TV off. Gotchya.
CB: Have a good day
GR: (Externally) Bye. (Internally) *&#%$)(% Woke me up to tell me it's raining *&$%^#. Oh! But wait! No baseball! *turns alarm clock off and goes back to sleep*

7:15 AM--There is no use trying to sleep anymore. So I get up and get to decorating Diva's Ladybug cake.

GR: Doo do doo decorating cakes is so much fun! But! I have no black frosting! 'Tis good to have connections at the town bakery! *calls bakery, makes arrangements to steal black food coloring for frosting*

7:45 AM--Laa le laaa I love when I don't have to go anywhere in the morning. *takes lazy and way too long of a shower*

8:17 AM--*Phone Rings again*
GR: Hello?
Glamour Dad: The game is still on.
GR: Are you sure?
GD: Yes. I just spoke to the coach.
GR: *&^#%$ $%@$$# Don't they understand it's raining?! I got a WAKE UP call because it was raining out. WHY are they still playing baseball?
GD: I don't know. But they are.
GR: DAMN! *click*

8:20 AM
GR: CJ, please go put your baseball pants and shirt back on, you are playing after all
CJ: I can't find my baseball shirt.
GR: *shakes fist to the heavens* OK, let's look for it.
*CJ and I commence tearing apart the house looking for mysterously disappearing shirt. CB does not answer his phone so I cannot ask him where it is*

8:25 AM--CJ, you are just going to have to wear a different shirt.

8:27 AM--Pull up to the bus with three minutes to spare!

After that fiasco, Diva and I ran down to the bakery to get our black frosting. Then it was off to the baseball game on what has turned out to be a BEAUTIFUL day. After the baseball game, we stopped and watched one of CJ's friends play HIS baseball game. And I've pawned the kids off on my HERO OF THE DAY for a couple of hours so I can get everything done.

What's that? OH, you wanted to see PICTURES of the Ladybug cake. I must say that I'm quite pleased with how it turned out. And while I am no professional cake decorator, it's a 5000% improvement over the castle cake from hell last year. SO here you go, the Ladybug cake in all his mismatched eye splendor:See? Cute, huh?

Here's a picture of the butterfly cake my mom made her too. She thinks it sucks. But I think it is uber cute!That's it for now. I'm sure I'll have LOTS of cute stories from the party tonight. But I've yet to find anyone willing to hook me up with a pitcher of margaritas for the after-party.

Any takers?

Monday, June 19, 2006

A Two-fer day

I just got a call from my hubby. His brother just got his date for returning to Iraq. Country Boy isn't one to just drop it all on the table, but I know this is a hard thing for him. The BIL has already been to Iraq once, three years ago. We all cried and were scared for them and prayed for them every day.

This time is harder though (I think) for my CB. I think BIL is a seargeant in the Army now. I'm not certain, but I do know that he's in charge of four or five kids (18 & 19 year olds) that will be going over there too.

BIL's Achilles tendon is ripped, but he is insistant on going because he doesn't want to let his men down. And while I understand it, it doesn't make it any easier.

Also, CB & BIL haven't been on the best terms for quite some time. BIL is a year younger than me, but he's still got a hell of a lot of growing up to do. Sometimes war does that for people. And sometimes they don't come back to their families.

I guess that's what scares me the most. I know he's a smart man. I know he's good at what he does. But the thought of trying to tell my kids that their uncle was killed in a war just kills me inside.

So BIL leaves Saturday. Please pray for him and all the other troops that are over there fighting right now. Pray that they will ALL come home safely to their families.


This week I had some pretty cool people bid to rent my blog! I choose Long, Slow, Beautiful Dance because I LOVE her layout. Plus, she just got a Mustang and while I'm excited for her, I'm also EXTREMELY jealous!

She's going to be participating in the 2006 Blogathon, so make sure you bookmark her so you can come back and help her raise money for the charity of her choice (sorry, I forgot the one she picked). Anyway, here are the other blogs that had bid on me:

Haunted House Dressing

Living with Multiple Personalities

These three are pretty cool too, so make sure you stop by to say hello!

I may come back later to update, but then again, I may not. Not a very eventful weekend & I need to save as much wittiness as possible for tomorrow night with the 11 girls at my house.

In the meantime, what do you think of the redesign? I ADORE it! I keep coming back to my own blog, just so I can look at it. Thanks to the gals at Zee-M Studios for the FANTASTIC template!

Yesterday was a highly productive day. I got the boat finished for Diva & CJ, plus FINALLY came up with a mask for CJ to wear after much trial and error. More error than trial really. It was flusterating.

Also, I started this new diet last week that is supposed to make the weight just melt off. Ha! I say. I am skeptical of diets. But! I got on the scale yesterday and I lost ten pounds! In ONE week! Madness I say! Just twenty more and I'll be at my pre-preggers weight. Thirty five more and I'll be where I was when I graduated high school! It's so great. I look in the mirror and I see myself again. It's been so long since I've actually LOOKED at myself. I mean, I put my makeup on and stuff like that, but I hadn't really looked in years. And when I looked today, it was good. And I was happy. And THAT is worth giving up my daily Coke habit (the soda of course).

Saturday, June 17, 2006

The one without a title

Yesterday I was feeling kind of mopey. I mean my baby is a child. And it's weird. Plus, CJ had his first ever slumber party last night.

I never understood what people said about kids growing up too fast. Now? 'Tis crystal clear.

Diva went to Glamour Mom's house for a girlie slumber party last night too. And Country Boy went to visit a friend of his in Semi-Civilization. So I had a quiet night to myself. It was kind of nice. I felt nostaligic, so I dug out a bunch of old pictures and remembered a lot of really fun times.

After that, I got my arse kicked in a couple battles over at Blog Explosion. Then I decided to watch The Wedding Planner and swoon over Matthew McConaughey for an hour and a half. And then I went to bed. It was a much needed relaxing evening.

This morning, the house was very quiet. So quiet that I slept until 9:00 this morning.

Now I'm well-rested and ready for more of TRPTWNE. I also have all the stuff for making The Phantom's boat for the Kiddie Parade. And I found a shirt for CJ. Now I just have to figure out a way to make the mask because no one out here in Podunk sells plaster cast tape. Grah!

Off to play Susie Homemaker.

Also, I finally got a list of my 100 things up, so make sure you click on it right underneath my profile info.

Friday, June 16, 2006

To My Baby. . .

My Dearest Diva,
Five years ago I could have never imagined what a sweet little girl would bring into my life. I knew from the moment I saw your face you were going to be special.

And now here you are in all your walking, talking, singing and dancing glory. The way that you make grown ups stop and think--and laugh--is something that I think is amazing. You have the brightest sense of humor of anyone I know.

And even though there are times when you drive me INSANE (like the time you washed your hair in the toilet), all of those little things add up to who you are today. And all the money in the world wouldn't convince me to have it any other way.

You are the most beautiful little girl I have ever known too. You're eyes are like nothing I've ever seen before. It's like God created a special color just for you, because he knew you were destined for greatness.

In these past five years, I have watched you blossom from a little baby who thought sleep was overrated into a beautiful young lady with no fear. I hope you never EVER lose that! I hope that you are always willing to take risks, to try your best. And if you fail, you know that Mommy is always there to pick you up and dust you off for the next round.

There are so many things that I want to say to you, and yet none of them seem to do my love for you even a smidgen of justice. But I do love you. And when I look into your face, I can still see that tiny little creature that kept me up most of the night (and peed in my bed) (and puked on me more times than I care to admit). I'm excited to see how far you have come in these short years. And I'm even more excited to see where you'll go in the next five.

I love you so very much, baby.

Happy Birthday!


Thursday, June 15, 2006

Thursday 13

Thirteen things I have to do in the next 5 days:

1. Finish the invitations for Diva’s birthday party

2. Buy a birthday present for CJ’s friend’s birthday party

3. Get CJ to a birthday party by 5:30 tomorrow night

4. Get to town by 5:00 tomorrow night (somehow)

5. Buy decorations and other party supplies for Diva’s birthday

6. Make Radio Flyer wagon into gothic boat for kiddie parade

7. Somehow get cardboard for said boat home from Glamour Dad’s house

8. Find someplace that sells plaster cast tape so I can make CJ’s Phantom mask

9. Find CJ’s white dress shirt and black dress pants

10. Probably go buy CJ new shirt & dress pants

11. Schedule Diva’s well-child checkup sometime in between summer rec activities

12. Try to make a ladybug cake

13. Deal with 11 girls in my house, all of which will be under the age of 7.

So there you have it, my first ever Thursday 13. Participating? Leave me a comment and I’ll add you to the list. I don’t know how to use those cool auto sign-up thingies that everyone else uses.

Edited to add. . .
Voila! I AM THE MASTER OF HTML. Ha ha. Not. But sign up if you want! :)

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Ah the joys of summer

Yesterday was my first ever experience with being a semi-SAHM with kids old enough for all the summer rec. activities. CJ & Diva have only decided on a couple for this week, but just those two were enough to make me crazy. CJ had to be at the baseball field by 11:00 yesterday morning. It was HOT and HUMID yesterday. There is no shade at said baseball field. And though it was too cute for words watching all the second and third graders try play a real game of baseball. And CJ scored a run, so methinks my retirement fund of famous children may pay off yet! :)

Then we had about a 45 minute break before Diva had to be at T-Ball. And if there were no words to describe how cute the older kids were, there most certainly are none for 4 & 5 year old girls playing t-ball. Sixteen girls, to be exact. And there were 16 boys too. Luckily GlamDad decided to come down and help because the two poor teenage boys that were supposed to be running the situation had NO CLUE. Doesn't help that I've known these kids since they were 8 and know they aren't the brightest bulbs on the tree, but everything seemed pretty organized, considering what they are up against.

After that, we were done for the day. And we were TIRED. I think we topped out at 90 with 80% humidity. Since TRPTWNE is still in a holding pattern on phase III, we still have no air conditioning downstairs. This makes for a cranky Glam. I had central air my entire life, until we moved to Podunk. Since all the houses were built in like 1897, there is not central air in the majority of them. And there's not even a possiblility to put it in our house because it still has the old radiant heat and it would cost more than the house is worth to put central in.

All the humidity culminated into what is now a hard rain. When I was driving from work spot # 1 to work spot #2, there was a big grey wall cloud over town. I have a 10 mile drive to spot # 2, and most of that was spent under a black and ominous looking cloud. It was actually quite pretty, because it was almost pitch black ahead of me, but behind me I could see the sun peeking through the clouds, almost like a second sunrise.

Once I drove through the big black cloud, the sky lightened up a bit and the downpour came. I ran as fast as I could to get into work, but in the 10 feet I was outside, I got drenched. Almost two hours later and I am still soaked. And it's still raining. Which means one of two things. Either 1) Humidity will disappear again for a while, so even thought it is supposed to be 90 this weekend, it will still be pretty nice or 2) This will heighten the humidity, and since it is supposed to be 90 this weekend, it will feel like 110 and I will want to KILL Country Boy for starting TRPTWNE before September.

I'm hoping for the former.

Monday, June 12, 2006

Attitude is everything. Or, why I despise Monday with every fiber of my being.

I woke up this morning, feeling pretty good. The Depression cloud is gone (Thank the Good Lord), and I actually GOT OUT OF BED when my alarm went off. This is HUGE for me. I then proceeded to put on a pretty pink shirt that makes me actually look skinny and popped my contacts in (only three tries) and left for work. The kids were excited to leave because they are starting at a new daycare (CJ's very best friend's mom) and CJ's baseball started up today too. As far as Mondays go, this was shaping up to be the best one ever.

Then I got to work. And there are things going on that make me worry. Which is making the day go downhill very much quickly like. And I'm back to hating Mondays.

But! I have a new renter! She's a Self-Proclaimed SUPER MOM! I can relate to that. Plus, she's got really cool pictures and a fun post about Laughter today. So go check her out. She's got much more interesting stuff to say than I do.

I'm off to fret some more about stupid business politics.

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Slacker Sundays

I'm feeling lazy today. It *is* Sunday after all. So I've come up with a plan. I'll put two sentences up for a story. Then, the next person that stops here adds two more to the story. I'll check back periodically today and add the comments to this post. Hopefully by the end of the day we'll have a pretty good story. It's not the greatest two sentences ever written in American Literature. But it's early and I'm not fully awake yet.

Oh, and let's keep it clean, folks. My mother might read this! ;)


It was not supposed to be this cold in the middle of June. Jackie pulled her blanket tighter around her neck and went to snuggle closer to Greg, only he was gone!

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Simple things that make it alllll better

So I'd still been feeling pretty depressed yesterday morning, but throughout the day, my spirit began to lift. I wasn't nearly as crabby and was realizing the whole world doesn't hate me.

Then I came home from work to this:

It's amazing how six pretty little flowers can change my whole outlook on life. Oh, and pay no attention to the disaster that is my dining room table. That's all thanks to TRPTWNE (The remodeling project that will not end). But! I have pictures of Phase II's completion:

See? It ALMOST looks like a real room! Just have to mud it, paint it, carpet it, and I'll have my own little office area!

We went to Semi-Civilization this morning so that I could finally step into the grown up world and get contacts. The thought of these little disks going on my eyes has had me a nervous wreck for two years. But! I did it! And I wore them for a whole two hours. My eyes feel like they are going to drop right out of my head from all the pulling and poking, but they are in! I'm so glad that I don't have to wear glasses every day. Mostly because I'm all about variety. Besides, how glamorous is it to wear nerd goggles every day?

Friday, June 09, 2006

Two reasons why I hate small towns--and one why I like them.

A few years ago I was involved in something that was--and still is--a really good opportunity for the high school girls in this community. I was a part of it when I was a senior, and continued to help out wherever I could until about four years ago when I was offered the position of Chairperson for the committee. I was excited and scared all at the same time. And because it was my first year, there were glitches in the way things ran. I hadn't really had any training for what I was doing, so it was all basically brand new. But in all, I thought I had done a really good job.

Then it came time for us to start planning for the next year, and this other person came in off the Chamber of Commerce board and started trying to dictate the way My committee was run. So I quit. There were other things that were said and done behind my back that made this whole thing very obvious that the "special people" in this town didn't like me and didn't want me in charge of the committee. Which, fine. But TELL ME! Don't go around behind my back and tell everyone else what you think of me. And DON'T complain to other people because you don't like the way something is done. You have an issue with me? Talk TO ME. Quitting was the best thing that I have ever done for my family and I don't regret it one little bit. And I was angry for a long time, but it was just because of the way it was handled. And I thought I was over it.

People, I am not over it. I went to a fundraiser for the girls last night (because I still think it's a good program and I will support it until I die--or move) and I am still not OK with seeing them all there. Especially the one who ran the takeover. She walks around like she's the best person in the whole wide world and it DRIVES ME INSANE.

I want so bad to be over this. To be able to fully forgive these people for the way I was treated and move on with my life. But I would also like to be able to walk into a store downtown and not feel like I'm being judged. I hate that I feel like there's something I have to prove to these people, but I still feel it. I've always been the person that goes and tries to fix problems. I was the mediator with my friends, and all I've ever wanted is just that everyone I come in contact with can see me as a good person. And up until I just typed that, I thought I needed people to like me too. But they don't have to like me. I would just like to feel like people can appreciate the fact that I'm NOT a bad person. That mistakes can be made and people get over them every single day. So why is it so hard?

Reason # 2 why I hate this rural area? I woke up yesterday morning with a wood tick on my forehead! *shriek!* *shudder* Yeah. Disgusting.

But I love this small area because of the things they do for little kids in the summer time. They have all these fun classes--all free!--where kids can go and try things that they maybe wouldn't have otherwise. Already CJ is signed up for baseball, and he has every intention of doing the drama camp, cooking classes, and countless other classes he's named to me. And there are even some that Diva can do. So they are both very excited for the summer, which in turn makes it a lot easier for me to get excited too.

Plus, even though the VIP's in this town may not like me, I have this INCREDIBLE group of friends that I love with all my heart. And I would have never met them if I hadn't stayed here.

Thursday, June 08, 2006


I tried to post for over an hour yesterday. Then gave up. It was a deep, meaningful, solve all the world's problems type post, but alas, ye shall never see it now.

Ok, so it wasn't really *that* deep. It was pretty much just me whining about how I have these depressed weeks every now and again. Then I went out and had coffee with friends and laughed and now I'm all better.

Except there is one part of it that's still bugging me. I'm a writer. I love to write stories. There are stories that pop into my head sometimes three times a say. But I never write them. When I get to type something--anything--I get all excited and jittery. However, when I actually have time to try and record all these fabulous stories in my head, I freeze up. Nothing comes out. And it's devastating. I want nothing more than to be able to finish a story, slap my name on it and call it a manuscript.

But then what? I'm a bad enough critic of myself. What would happen if I took my precious little baby manuscript out into the real world and tried to sell it? What if I ended up with nothing but a bunch of big old "form" rejection letters? Worse yet, what if I did sell and ended up with a bunch of reviewers saying that all I sold was a big ol' load of crap? I don't think my psyche could handle that.

So, I write on my blog. And I make notes about the stories I've started and the ones that might make a good story someday. And I hope that there comes a day again where my writing comes as naturally to me as breathing. A day where I'm comfortable enough with my ability that I can submit it, taking the rejections as what they are--all part of the craft--and maybe one day holding a book in my hand that has my name on it.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Valuable lessons learned today

1. When taking looks at other people's computers, have them bring their own mouse. Because the odds are that my mouse WILL NOT WORK, causing much headache and cursing.

2. One needlenose plier will not open storm windows with broken tabs. Two, however, will open every single damn window in the house.

3. I need to clean under my computer better. I woke up this morning to no cable and no internet (Gasp! The HORROR!) only because the check I was supposed to mail at the beginning of the month was hidden underneath my desk.

4. I really need to be better at naming my pictures when I upload them to the computer. I have 75 apple orchard pictures, and I don't know what a single one of them is. Mostly because I didn't take time to look at them until I started uploading to my Flickr zeitgiest. But also because I flipping HATE Corel photo album with a passion. So much so that I uninstalled it from my computer, only to have NOTHING else on it work. So I reverted back to before I uninstalled it, only it's pissed at me and refuses to work. Because of that, I have no thumbnail, so it's a secret surprise picture until I upload it. Grah!

Anywhoo, we had a massive thunderstorm come through, so I was awake at about 2 with a sense of impending doom (it is 06/06/06 after all). I was then blessed with a morning serenade by the school marching band at 7:00 this morning. We have no more school. I didn't have to go to work today. I would have been able to sleep much much later (ok, until 8) had the drumline not been marching RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE this morning. Most days, I love the convienience of living right across the street from the school. Today is not one of those days.

I've been trying to come up with a nickname for The Boy on this site. I need something that suits him. I called him The Superhero over on my old blog, but I'm all about change! Plus I am lazy! And that's too many letters to type. So after much deliberation, we have Diva, Country Boy, CJ, and Me. Descriptions and explanations will be in the sidebar after I'm done with this post.

Monday, June 05, 2006

New Renter!

I have my first renter here at my new blog! Contrary to the title of her blog, Uncool Mommy, seems very cool! Plus she's got a link to the Song of the Cebu, which is one of the GR kids' FAVORITE songs. So go check her out, wouldjya? Her color scheme and layout are beautiful and fun and I'm honored to have her as my tenant this week.

Phase 2 of the REMODELING PROJECT THAT WILL NOT END is finally complete! Can we say woo-freaking-hoo!?!?! Country Boy (the hubby) and I put up the last sheet of sheet rock yesterday before going to a graduation open house. It turned out to be a fabulous evening.

I mentioned on my old blog that my kids have a certain affliction for the movie The Phantom of the Opera. This is one of the oddest obsessions I've ever seen an almost 5 year old and almost 7 year old have. But they LOVE it. They both have copies of the soundtrack in their rooms and I've woken up on occasion to the sound of them acting out the parts of Christine and The Phantom along with the songs. I can't tell you how much fun it is to watch kids fall in love with something that isn't Kidz Bop 8 frillion!

So anyway, I had told one of my friends about the cuteness factor of this whole scene and she had wanted to see them do it. Said friend happens to be a trained singer that was semi-pro prior to having kids. She had spent time touring around the state and was a music teacher as well. She was at the party yesterday and asked if the kids would sing for her. The Diva was all for it, but Boy Jr. was too "nervous". So Diva did a solo performance. Friend was so impressed she made Diva sing it twice more. She couldn't believe how well she sounded for just a little girl. And it really is quite amazing. She is always right on pitch and her form is flawless! But this coming from someone as experienced as my friend is was HUGE! The Glamorous part of me had stars in my eyes, thinking there's a future for her in this. But the Redneck part of me knows better than to start forcing her to do things she maybe doesn't want to do. Plus she is so little. It is exciting for both halves, though, to think that she might have a future in this.

See why the two halves of me get along so well? They really balance each other out most days. ;)


Friday, June 02, 2006

The Fun Never Stops. . .

My evening turned out completely different than anything that I had anticipated it to be.

The Boy had been complaining of a headache for most of the day, but it was minor so I didn't worry about it. After he ate dinner, though, it started hurting worse. I told him to go lay down and he was out in a matter of minutes.

The Hubby got home and had had a bad day at work, so we were all doing our best to avoid him. However, he needed my help putting up some sheet rock, so I tiptoed to the REMODELING PROJECT THAT WILL NOT END and held on to the wall. The stuff wasn't fitting the way that he had anticipated it to, so (like most men) he got pissed at it and tried to throw it on the ground. When he did this, he dislocated his shoulder (again)*. I called my dad to come over and watch the still-sleeping Boy and the incredibly well-behaved Girl so I could take Hubby to the hospital. I then called our friends and let them know we would not be coming to their house.

By the time my dad got to our house, Hubby had slipped his shoulder back into joint and was ready to get back to work. The girly-girl in me was all "EWWWWW!" but the redneck in me said "COOL!". I suppose since it's the third time he's done this, it gets a little bit easier to get back in the socket every time.

So, Hubby is cleaning up the mess he made and all seems to be back to normal. That's when The Boy wakes up crying. We have now figured out that the poor kid has migrane headaches. I bring him upstairs & give him a bath. After the bath (thankfully), he throws up. Which I feel really bad for, but it was funny because as soon as he was done, he was all chipper and said "Hey! It's gone!" So, that's how we figured out he's got migranes, which run very deep in my family. This is not the first time that he's done this, and much to his dismay, we've figured out that it's when he gets to play PS2 for longer than the time I allow him to. He is royally pissed about this.

In other news, I've reverted to a stupid generic template for now. I can't seem to figure out what I'm doing wrong, but I can't make my pretty one come back. I'm trying to learn a little bit more about this whole HTML CSS blah, blah, blah foreign language stuff. So maybe someday I'll even be smart enough to design my own.

*Hubby dislocated his shoulder two years ago whilst pretending he was younger than he was. He attempted wakeboarding (a combination of water skiiing and surfing behind a boat) and wiped out, dislocating it. Nasty site, let me tell you! Second time, he was in the swimming pool playing with the kids. I was beginning to think this man needs to stay away from water, but it's clear now that won't save him either.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Strange Occurences

There have been some strange things going on here at Glamorous Redneck today. My site keeps switching between the pretty template that I found and just plain old black & white. So if you're here and it's ugly, I'm sorry. I'm usually much more presentable.

In the mean time, it is the first day of Summer vacation. The kids have already been at each other's throats. Luckily, we have a weekly bible study that is basically a big play time for the kids to go to tonight. Which means that I have reminded them of this and that boys and girls who can't get along don't get to go play with their friends. Things have been on the upswing ever since.

We finally got some rain last night, so some of the humidity has gone away. But its still HOT. It just doesn't seem fair. And yes, I'm whining. I promise to quit complaining as soon as we have air conditioning back.